ladybird


it was the heat
or maybe the moist air
or perhaps it was the summer
that pushed me to leave; 
for it is rare for me to not care

but i listened to my mother
cry and shout in that unforgiving weather
she looked at me with so much anger
i wonder if i could ever
look at my daughter 
that way

my mother seems more concerned
that people might hate her
but i am her daughter
i am her
and i wish she cared 
more 
that i feel this way

is this punishment 
for straying
for feeling
and acting 
in ways
that she wishes she could change?

what a shame 
what a shame 
what a shame

how could a daughter feel this way?

if i write about it,
will she despise
that I've written about her a certain way?

So then,
I take it all back.
curse the thumb that bleeds!

For it was the heat
or perhaps the moist air
and maybe even the summer
that made me realise
I could no longer stay.

~ ៷

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