mother mary

when was the last time you held me, mary?

like you meant it, like you loved me.

all that you see now 

is where i am compromised

mary, are my wounds not yours to heal?

forget the lousiness that brought us here,

or all the hurt you bore from birth to now,

what has veiled your affection, mary?

as to beat me down, treat me foul.

what do you pray for mary?

who are your words meant to reach?

for they read like testimonies,

meant to preach rather than to reveal.

God that you so lovingly praise,

does He lead you, as well, in the way that you speak?

when you rouse all my past doubts

and you pick and scratch at the seams?

my iniquities, now weapons against me,

mary, mary, 

it is thou that hast forsaken me.

eyes who witnessed my suffering most,

saw my fingers grow big, recalling when they were small.

it is only you who knows so much of me.

mary, 

what sin did i commit?

so treacherous was it,

as to sever the cord 

joining your womb to my mouth.

forgive me, mary,

i love you still, i love you most,

i feel that i always will.

but love gets lost in translation,

and yours becomes hard to tell,

for all i do is grovel, stumble,

and apologise over and over again.

mary, 

who seemed to have loved me so, 

once,

so very long ago,

may the heavens be kinder, 

and give you light,

and for both of us, 

no more sorrow.